On Perfect Marriage
On January 16th 2020 Masyan and I celebrate the fourth anniversary of our partnership. Yes, I just used the term partnership to try to sound more professional, instead of frankly and hopelessly said "the fourth anniversary of being boyfriend and girlfriend". As a matter of fact, this is our first January 16th where we have been officially married. So yeah, we both come to the point of asking each other, do we celebrate our partnership on November 10th now? Which was our wedding date and not make a big deal about January 16th anymore. Or do we celebrate both? Which gives us one more excuse to go on a fancy date and eat somewhere nice :p
On a more critical note, I would like to take this time to just sit down and write wonderful thing about being married. Due to work related reason, we are still living in two different cities for the time being. So whenever he comes home for the weekend and we get to spend time together, it somehow still feels like a honeymoon. Yes, I do get to experience the struggle of waking up Masyan in the morning, but I don't get to iron his work shirt or pack him lunch or do other household stuff that I imagined married couples who live under the same roof do.
When we're together, we are basically boyfriend and girlfriend with a whole lot of privileges. I get to be a girlfriend who sleeps in her boyfriend's room and has dinner with his parents every night. He gets to be a boyfriend who takes me on a date without worrying about driving me home too late. We get to hold hands and hug and kiss in public spaces with no guilt at all :p and long the list goes.
What I enjoy the most about being married, so far, is how thrilling the regular stuff can be when done together. When we weren't married, if we went out on a date and he offered to pay for my meal, I felt kind of guilty. I felt bad that he needed to spend his money on me. But now that we are a union of two, I feel at peace whenever he pays for our meal. It's this simple gesture that makes me feel that he takes care of me and things will always be okay.
What I am undoubtedly very grateful for, now that I am married, is the fact that I have this wonderful human being that will stand by me through it all. When I was younger I was always worried if the future husband would accept me if I didn't shave my legs. But last month I had to stay at the hospital and one afternoon I had a horrible stomach ache that made me yell and cry like there was a demon inside of me. I then felt like I needed to poop so badly but at the same time I was so drained out that I thought I was going to faint. My mother ended up walking me to the bathroom and hugged me while I sat and tried my absolute best to poop. When I got sober, I saw Masyan standing by the bathroom door, ready to help me up and wipe my butt. I was lost for words. Right there and then I knew I had found my champion. I have someone who loves my whole package, even my un-shaved legs.
What I learn about being married, is that perfect marriage does not mean it started with a lavish wedding reception followed by two weeks honeymoon to an exotic place. It does not mean that you get butterflies every time you're together and there's a Disney song playing in your head every time you look into each other's eyes. It does not mean that the two of you will have the same opinion on things and will not get into arguments for years.
What I have with Masyan is the right amount of good and just the right amount of bad. To me, that is as perfect as it can be. There are things that he does that I haven't gotten the hang of, but I have faith that one day I will. There are parts of me the he probably hasn't made sense of yet, but over time I know he will. And through it all we will have each other. Isn't that remarkable?